Who is this bozo?
It all began when I was neglected as a child.
I needed a lot of attention and my parents only gave me love.
So I took to the stage - appearing on all sorts of kids' shows: Saturday Disney, Newsround, Finders Keepers.
I won rollerblades, but it wasn't enough.
After spending my adolescence as the fat kid, I graduated, as most of us fat kids do, to become "the funny one".
After a gap year spent teaching wolves how to search for water, I started working in the more aggressive field of Stand Up Comedy.
Since those early days, I have appeared around the world in various guises, touting my wares to Australia, Switzerland, Hong Kong, Singapore, Norway and Manchester.
I've been on the telly - Fast and Loose ( yes you DO remember it) BBC 2, Live at the Electric- BBC 3, Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled - Dave, Drunk History -Comedy Central and The Dog Ate My Homework-CBBC.
I've been on the Radio 4 - The Now Show, Fifteen Minute Musicals, Newsjack and various voices in different bits and bobs.
I used to spend a lot of time being Loretta Maine - an adorable singer/songwriter from the USA, but she is currently in rehab.
And I am a core member of the Olivier Award winning Showstoppers! We make up musicals. On the spot. Yes, it is as impressive as it sounds.
I am also the Creative Director of Perspectiva - a space for us to think about how we think about the world. We do monthly events. Yes.
And I am the co-founder of Sunday Assembly - a network of Godless Congregations around the world. SAY WHAT? Yes - you can read more about that here. It's an extra string to my funny bow.
IS THERE ANYTHING SHE DOESN'T DO?
Yes. Extreme Sports, HGV driving, fishing, hunting for her dinner, tequilla slammers (not anymore, anyway) and housework.